hate is a strong word... it means so much, especially if you really mean it; if it comes from a place of truth.
i can honestly say i have a raw hatred for few people.
i've recently come to realize that there are roots to my disdain for this particular person. at first i tried convincing myself that it was jealousy, that it was from my unending well of insecurity that manifested an unrelated hate toward this person. i was merely projecting my inability to fly through things. i didn't really hate this person, it was me.
i'm starting to think this isn't the case; this leads me to ask myself: am i creating holes or am i finally accepting ones that have already been there? maybe it's both. maybe it's a combination of the two.
the point is, i can't get away from this person... it's starting to seep into different elements of my life...there are other lines that are starting to blur and adding this on top... makes life confusing.
i'm so blinded by this anger and hate that... i don't know what to do with it. it's frustrating... maybe i should pick up kickboxing...
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